Sleepless Nights
by Kitsunes Fire
Summary: ...I hate these things . Just something I wrote out of boredom. Rating as high as it is for later chapters...KxH. Angst in the first chapter, but will eventually be romance.
1. Chapter 1

Sleepless Nights

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho, any of the Yu Yu Hakusho characters or….ah, come on. You all know the drill. .O

A/N: I am bored. And anyone who knows me, things get dangerous when KF gets bored. This is something born from pure and utter boredom as I wait not-so-patiently for my rp partner to hurry up and e-mail me the next part of our rp…so I make no guarantees as to the quality of this…thing. I may end up labeling it with a PWP, but I don't know yet. Depends on what I end up writing. P Which, might I add, is completely undetermined at this point.

Ah, hell- you didn't choose this fic to hear me jabber on. Enjoy and please review. .+

Hiei closed his eyes as daybreak loomed on the horizon. There would be precious few hours before daylight came, therefore precious few hours for the youkai to restore his energy for the day ahead. Not to say he would sleep…no. Hiei never sleeps. Not anymore. Not since the nightmares started. The closest thing to sleep he encounters is passing out from pure exhaustion after a day and night of endless fighting, and even those occasions are rare. Most often he is like he is now- drifting somewhere between wake and dream; somewhere where he is not fully conscious yet not fully lost in the realm of sleep. Somewhere lost in his thoughts, lost in his memories, lost in his mind, but not by any means lost in slumber.

A small frown make it's way across the small demon's face, this soon becoming a snarl. Yes, it seems that once again Hiei has danced too close to the fire of the realm of slumber, the taunting teasing flames licking at him, becoming him in until he once again became engulfed in sleep. And you know what happens when he falls asleep...Sure enough, he awakens an hour later with a strangled cry of agony. His breath comes hard, jets of ice still pulsing madly through his veins. A thin film of cold sweat covers his toned body, his chest rising and falling sharply with each shaky breath. Slowly, he sinks back into the branch he is so precariously balanced on- it is a miracle he hasn't fallen- and closes his eyes once more, though this time he is nowhere near that fearful realm of slumber. His mind is spinning much too quickly for him to get anywhere near _that _again anytime soon.

…Looks like it will be another sleepless night…

Months have gone by, and still no change can be seen in the little youkai's sleeping patterns, though more often now than before he resorts to exhausting himself to make himself fall asleep. Lately, however, even that hasn't been working- he falls asleep sure enough, though even when deeply unconscious he experiences those awful nightmares that keep him constantly sleepless. He would cry himself to sleep if he knew how to…Instead, he settles for staying up until he passes out from exhaustion, then repeating the cycle. Sure, this makes him cranky and aggravated….but no-one notices anything new. To them, the only change is that he is now more vocal about his hate of everything around him.

How little they know.

Sometimes, he wishes he could show them what was really happening to him; what had happened to him. Sometimes he wonders that, maybe, if he wasn't all alone, that things could be different.

But then he slaps himself and brings himself back to reality. Nothing will change. Nothing _can_ change…

It's times like this that make the little fire demon want to curl up in a dark corner and cry. But he doesn't. He doesn't know how. The only tears he knows how to cry are those of blood, and even when he is sobbing no-one notices the ruby tears or any signs that they were ever there. Either that, or they notice and just don't care. Hiei reminds himself it shouldn't bother him- no-one has ever cared…why should these morons be any different? But he knows deep inside of him that he _needs_ someone to be different…He doesn't even know why, but he knows it's what he needs.

If only he knew one of those morons _was_ different.

Twilight hovers on the horizon, the sky not able to decide if it should stay light or give in to darkness. Darkness wins, of course, and in a matter of minutes the sky is pitch black. The city streets slowly empty, those who have homes locking themselves tight within them, those who don't securing themselves wherever they think will keep them safe for one more night. Few wander the sidewalks, though those who do are of the kind you don't want to associate yourself with, Hiei found out first hand on more than one occasion. It didn't take the little youkai long to debate his options, and finally he settled on the one logical choice he had left.

Three soft taps on frost-laced glass later he was standing in the corner of Kurama's warm bedroom. It was only the second time he had been there- normally he would just conjure up some of his energy and warm himself through the night- or at least through most of it. But tonight he didn't have enough energy for that method…it was just too damned cold for him to be spending his energy like that. If he tried, he would be warm for all of 10 minutes before he would be out of energy and pass out, this time to never wake up again. And as tempting as that sounded, frostbite was not how Hiei wanted to go.

The young fire apparition sighed softly as he settled down in the dark corner, curling up near the radiator. He stifled a laugh as he heard the kitsune's faint snoring- only the bedside table separated Hiei from Kurama's platform bed. He blushed as he realized he thought the sound was cute…that the human youko looked adorable when he was asleep…the half-fire apparition quickly shook his head, hoping to clear it from these thoughts. Sleep came easily that night for the first time in years, and no nightmares haunted him in his serene slumber…

Okay, so I finally titled this thing…though the title may change later. I am too lazy as of right now to come up with anything better… .O I hope it doesn't sound too random, but then again, I _did_ warn you. If you couldn't tell this will likely later become a KxH fic. Though I wish I knew where I was going with this….I am kind of typing as it comes to me, so if any of you have any suggestions they are greatly appreciated! Please Review! 33


	2. Chapter 2

Sleepless Nights Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Aw, come on. Do I really need to say it?

A/N: Here's a shout out to my three wonderful reviewers! I responded to each of your reviews personally, so I feel no need to repeat myself here. But thank you all SO much! I hope I don't let you down.

Hiei awoke the next morning with a soft groan. Morning had come far too soon…though the kitsune seemed unaware of this. His soft snoring told Hiei without the little demon having to move an inch that he was still fast asleep. Even so, he looked over at the sleeping fox demon, unable to resist the temptation of being able to gaze unguarded at his beloved kitsune.

Beloved…Even the young youkai was unaware of when the stupid fox had become so dear to him- all he knew is that although he would never label it as such, the way he felt towards Kurama was the closest thing he had ever felt to love. And that feeling felt very nice, though again, Hiei would never admit such to be true. A faint smile touched the small demon's thin lips, though it disappeared as quickly as it had come when Hiei noticed the sleeping fox's eyes start to flutter open.

It took all of the fire apparition's self restraint to remain stoic and emotionless as he watched an adorable yawn escape from the sleepy kitsune's luscious mouth. He rubbed his eyes, stretching before smiling brightly over at his guest and wishing him a good morning. Once again, it took everything in him for Hiei remain indifferent and simply grunt a 'hn' in response. But he just couldn't allow himself to show just how much that human kistune effected him- just how much he had caused the icy fire demon to melt. Of course, the human youko who has known this young youkai for so long thinks nothing of his detached nature, though he also doesn't know him well enough to realize just how attached the little demon really is.

A short while later Kurama is in the shower, leaving Hiei alone in his bedroom. The small demon debates leaving, and though he longs to flee he finds himself unable to move. Something deep inside him just can't bear to leave…mostly due to the fox that resides there, but also partially due to the simple fact that it was much warmer in the apartment than it was outside it. Frowning softly, Hiei settles down into a comfortingly dark corner, slipping deep into his thoughts as he waits for Kurama to return from the shower. In fact, he is so lost within his own mind that he doesn't even notice the fox demon walk out of the shower, past him and into the closet, nor does he notice the redhead emerge from the closet. No- he is only awoken from his trance when the kitsune's soft, feminine voice calls out to him.

"Hiei?"

Startled, the little demon almost forgets to add the trademark bite to his naturally soft voice. "…..What?"

Kurama gently smiles in response. "Are you all-right, Hiei?"

This time the fox receives no verbal response- all he hears is a soft "hn". The youko shrugs, not sure if he should take that as a yes or know but not allowing it to show that he cared if Hiei was all-right or not. Besides, in the spirit fox's mind, it was a stupid question. Hiei….Hiei was never all-right, especially as of late.

Giving up on trying to make conversation with the little youkai, Kurama leaves the room. Before the door closes Hiei can hear an invitation to breakfast, though Hiei opts to sit on the kitsune's windowsill instead. He wasn't hungry, and didn't want to have to talk with anyone…he was never any good at conversation. His eyes drift closed before he can catch himself, and before he knows it has fallen deep asleep once again.

The peace is over. The nightmares have returned. Hell is back.

Okay, that's where I shall end it for now. I figure you readers have waited long enough for something, so I shall post this bit. Next chapter shall be the nightmare…buwah hah hah. Please review and any comments/suggestions are greatly appreciated!


	3. Sorry

Heyy everyone…

So sorry for the extreme delay in this fic. I started writing the next chapter at home, but forgot to put it on my flash drive before I left for camp. And here at geek camp, irocicly, we have very limited computer/internet access. So yeah…right now I am in the process of re-writing the next chapter on my laptop, but that may take a while- I just started another fic as well on said laptop, so between the two it is rather time consuming. Especially since I am _supposed _to be doing work…lol. Apart from the fact that I am having a bit of writers block on this fic… Anyway, thanks for your patience and any comments or suggestions are greatly appreciated.

Arigato!

-KF


	4. AN

Heyy everyone!

Just a quick message to say I am currently looking for people to co-author fics with. I am really flexible over what said fic will be about, so if you are interested please either e-mail or PM me and we can get things started. Thanks!

Oh, and sorry for taking so long to update this fic...I have come to a bit of writers block on this fic, so I don't know what to write anymore. Any ideas are greatly appreciated! Thanks!


	5. Chapter 3

Okay. This has taken forever for me to update. But after going away from it for 4 (or more?) months, now that I am looking back at it I am seeing more potential with this fic. So I shall continue. I am sorry if this turns out to be crappy….xP Please review!

Much love,

-KF

_I am surrounded by darkness. This is nothing foreign to me—this feeling of cold detachment far from unfamiliar. So why does it frighten me so?_

_…This place…this eerie room of shadows…I think I have been here before. It is as if I have lived an alternate existence, for although I feel as though this is not my first venture into this frontier, I don't remember any such excursion. I don't ever remember being anywhere quite like this before…_

_Before my eyes the darkness melts away, revealing a face thinly veiled in shadows. I know this person, but much like my surroundings, although I am familiar with them I don't remember anything about them. _

_The face moves closer…soon a face becomes a bust, and a bust becomes a statue, and a statue becomes a being. The more I see of you the more I am certain this is not our first meeting. Something about you gives you away…if only I knew what that something was. _

_My eyes close for but a moment—just a little more than a blink—but that moment is all you needed. Before I can open my eyes once more you are gone. How strange. I start to walk after you, but find that I cannot move. I realize all too late why I have been rendered immobile. Using speed that surpasses even my own you have snuck up behind me and attached me to some sort of machine, so quickly and silently that it left me none the wiser. Once again I attempt to move, though this time freedom from this accursed contraption is my goal. _

_…_

_And once again, I fail._

_How can you restrain me so? No being has ever been able to pull off such a feat. What is it that makes you so unique? What gives you the abilities that none possess? _

_I find that the longer I wait for you to make your next move the more I notice my vulnerability. And the more I notice my vulnerability, the more I fear. I fear you. And I am rather certain you know it. Why else would you prolong the torture of your prey? You know I am afraid, and you want me to drown in my own terror before you drown me in my own blood. _

_Shivers instinctively race across my back, drawing out an involuntary shudder as the cold steel of what I presume to be your blade dances across my skin. You do not pierce my flesh—no, not yet. Not so soon. You are an expert in this art, the art of torture. You know that it is much more painful to tease than it is to harm directly. _

_Of course, even the most seasoned expert has their limits, and before long you must give in to your sadistic desires and finally slice open my pale flesh. Although the spider-web of cuts your blade leaves behind stings like a maze of paper-cuts across my sensitive spine, I refuse to give in to what you want. I know that it only satisfies you even more to hear my cries, and I refuse to give you any more satisfaction than you deserve. _

_You deserve so little. I plan to give you nothing._

_I can't help but whimper as you slice deeper into my shoulder blade, the cold metal piercing my nerves and destroying a bit of my self control along with it. I can almost see you smile as I give you that one sound, in effect also giving you hope. If I make one sound, there is a chance I will make more._

_You soon learn this train of thought is correct—before long you have me screaming. I am not even aware of what I am saying, only that I am probably begging you to stop. Gods I hate myself…I hate myself so much. I am so weak. I am even worse than you are, scum, for I am feeding your desires. I am giving you exactly what you wanted. How is that in any way a victory? To top it all off, the same blade that turned my body into a bloody mess also strips my of my clothing. You rape me…as though you could hurt me any more than you already did. But the worst part-- I still don't even know who you are…_

_The last thing I know before I lose my consciousness is the sound of my own voice screaming in a foreign tongue._

As if on cue, just as he loses consciousness in his dream Hiei awakens. A thin film of cold sweat covers him, his breathing ragged and abnormal. Ruby eyes are wide open in a moment of pure terror, though the little apparition forces said terror deep within himself, refusing to show his fear. Shaking his head, he can't believe he still lets this recurring nightmare effect him so much.

In one fluid cat-like motion he jumps off of the windowsill. It is a wonder he didn't fall off the narrow ledge in his sleep...must be the learned balance from many a night spent in treetops. His sensitive hearing detects sounds in the kitchen-- muffled noises created no doubt by a certain kitsune making breakfast. Or is it lunch now? No matter. It is food, and at that moment the little Koorime decides he is hungry.

It takes Hiei all of five seconds to arrive in the kitchen. As expected, Kurama stands before him, making what appears to be a rather hearty breakfast. Eggs, sausage, bacon, toast...in short, all sorts of human foods that Hiei knew only by taste and none by name. Never-the-less the little demon couldn't help but smile-- the food before him smelled good enough, so who was he to complain?

A few steps more and Hiei pretends to be looking over the feast set out before him, though in reality all he wanted was to be closer to his fox. Little does the sly fox know, but just the nearness they shared at that particular moment was more than enough to quell the little fire demons fears and take away the after-effects of the nightmare...though it did nothing to help his nerves. Rather, this closeness made his nerves even more sensitive, though for a completely different reason. The fox demon, of course, is oblivious to all of this as he piles healthy portions of food onto Hiei's plate. Hiei can't help but inwardly sigh at Kurama's beauty, even as he performs the simplest, most mundane of tasks.

Ah. Behold the wonders of young love.


End file.
